Well, whilst everyone on here has been absolutely gorgeous to me and saying the nicest things about my photos etc, in the "real world" there is precious little going on in the lovelife of old Jess....Now, a line must be drawn between lovelife and sexlife, but I've decided they should be the same thing now. I'm just so used to people (at work or when I go out) chasing me, but it's only ever for one thing, which was fine for a while, I was happy to go with it. But now I think I want something more than that, cuz I think I might even deserve it, you know? But it's so hard finding someone normal who wants what I want...that isn't female. Or 55.
So basically what I'm getting at is that I'm trying to turn over a new leaf, like tonight at work this table of guys asked me if I give my number to customers and I said no, (and they were CUTE) whereas a week ago I would have given it to them. See, I'm being good! And despite any attention I may be getting, the old self esteem is still through the floor...and I really don't know what to do to get it up, I've never really had any before, but I think that and some self-respect would go a long way.
I'm also sick of being alone....well I'm not alone, it's not like I have no friends, but I really miss the closeness and the intimacy of it, you know? God I sound like a loser! I'm so sorry guys, this is such a load of drivel and must have been as boring as all hell to read, I'll shut up now
